I have a confession. My Christmas tree is still up! All my other Christmas decorations are put away (well MOST of them…) But, for some reason, I just couldn’t quite pack up my Christmas tree on my kitchen counter. It’s filled with wonderful family memories and fun Disney ornaments from years gone by.
As time passed I had an idea! I removed the ‘Merry Christmas’ ornaments and replaced them with red and white hearts and made a darling Disney ‘Valentine Tree.’ So now, here we are, the day after Valentine’s Day and it’s still up. Why? Because when I plug it in the lights fill my dark living room each night with sweet reminders of those I love. It’s my LOVE tree.
You know the main reason it remains is because I have been dealing with severe back pain. When I get home after work, I lay flat and stare at the little tree; it makes me feel happy instead of feeling like a failure because I haven’t put it away yet. Maybe this has happened to you at some point in your life. The little glowing tree kinda makes me think about the nightlight my dad would turn on in my room before I would go to sleep. Somehow having a whimsical little night light calmed me and made me feel secure that my parents were close by in case I needed them. Is that weird?
Now I am the grown up, my daddy passed away over 25 years ago and my mom is quite frail. I wish they could hold me again and tell me it will all be okay. I’ll be honest, since this is my FIRST surgery EVER, I am a bit nervous and afraid of the possibility the pain will remain. Plus, my mom had back surgery several years ago and it did not go well and left her quite disabled. It’s times like this, when my mind takes over with all the scary scenarios and what Ifs, that I have to remind myself to TAKE THOSE THOUGHTS CAPTIVE! I DO have something to give me courage. I have a Heavenly Father and He reminds me that He is near to calm me and let me know that everything is in HIS control.
Sooo I have decided to keep my ‘LOVE Tree’ up until I have recovered from my surgery in a few weeks. When my friends come by to visit and comment why my Christmas tree is still up I can share my story of the little tree and why it makes me happy and reminds me to trust God with my fears and pain and know He is with me. My goal is NOT to make it into an Easter tree in April…but you never know.
When I am afraid, I will put my trust in you – Psalm 56:3